Bluebells in your shadow

I get a good feeling 

Like a hit 

Sometimes 

When I see you 

In the wet and grey miasma 

Ill as moonlight

Sometimes yet  

I feel as nothing as it gets 

Unless you show me your naked 

Consternation 

Your ferocious equanimity 

And the bluebells 

In your shadow 

Sometimes 

I feel like that

I feel like I am nothing 

In the palm of your demands 

Ten years after I ran away 

I ran away from feeling 

Deranged 

In the first place 

By writing disturbance 

into submission 

By fighting perturbance 

With admonition 
Like the ancient God Lurex

Trying to stop someone 

From having a heart attack 

By slapping them in the face 

I am vinegar wasp jam 
drowning 

In half an inch of lace.